Wednesday, February 29, 2012

How i met my Sakinah. How i fallen in love with her (part 4)

Several months passed by, nothing much going on between us. 9th April 2009, i went to the UK to visit my sister in Nottingham. I stayed there for 3 months. Before going to the UK, i told Sakinah that i was coming. Again, I asked her if i come to Scotland, would she be my tour guide. I wasnt serious back then. But she said it would be wonderful if i come. While i was in the Nottingham, i diligently stalked her friendster again. In fact, she started to give comments on my photos taken in the UK. You know reading those comments were like a hope for me. A sign that she's actually gave a damn about me. And we started to chat again. I still remember she told me how much she missed KFC etc..and how has she forgotten the warmness and humidity in Malaysia. She hasnt gone back for 4 years. Everyday when i woke up, i would turn on my laptop hoping to see "Sakinah Omar is online" or "Sakinah omar has sent you a comment" in my email. When i saw those, this is how i felt like

The feeling i felt back then, sweet and bitter at the same time. I felt so happy that i could die every time we had conversation. But indescribable seed of sorrow in my heart trying to accept the fact that in reality her heart belongs to someone else. Not me. But i kept it very well. I did not let her know. That's the problem with me. Always falling for the wrong one. I havent been in love for so long but suddenly when it does, its a wrong one. I do not know how to describe it, Have you guys listened to Glen Hansard - Falling Slowly. That is exactly how i felt about her.

Until one day i decided i wanted to go to Scotland. I wanted to see her. At the same time i could go sightseeing. So going for holidays in Scotland as an excuse to see her. Perfect! I had a plan. A perfect plan. Think its a suicide plan.

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